The List
by A Touch of the Blues
Summary: On a bitter winter night weeks after Ron's departure, Harry and Hermione struggle to come to terms with their emotions. Will the loss of their friend bring them closer together or drag them further apart?
1. The Only One Who Never Left

**Author's Note**: This is a story told in two, maybe three chapters. I'm still debating whether or not to write a conclusion. Chapters one and two are already complete. Please leave a review. I will update with chapter two tomorrow night.

**Description**: On a bitter winter night weeks after Ron's departure, Harry and Hermione struggle to come to terms with their emotions. Will the loss of their friend bring them closer together? Or drag them farther apart?

**The List**

**The Only One Who Never Left**

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Harry sat alone in the tent, working hard to keep his mind from wandering to a very dark place. Hermione had taken the first watch of the night and, consequently, was outside making sure that no intruders came anywhere near their encampment. It had been nearly a month since the departure of Ron and the disastrous blowout that had ensued. Harry would have liked to think that the exit of his best friend came as a shock, an unforeseen event, but he knew it wasn't true. Harry had known for a while before Ron had actually left that a confrontation was imminent.

It followed a pattern; not just with Ron but with everyone who he had ever felt close to or who could have made a difference in his life. One way or another they had all abandoned him.

Harry brooded silently. He really should be trying to get some sleep, for in just a couple hours he would be taking Hermione's place on the night watch. But he couldn't sleep. Not now. Not with such strong feelings of rancor building in his heart. It just wasn't fair! Who was Ron Weasley to storm off in a rage, claiming to be the victim of injustice? Was he the one who had been marked by a sadistic madman when there was another boy who had fit all the criteria but who he had chosen to ignore? Was he the one who grew up without a family, forced to endure the mistreatment and humiliation meted out by his last vestiges of blood relation?

Was Ron Weasley the one who had grown up ignorant of his identity only to have it suddenly thrust upon him at the tender age of eleven, all while being held up to some ridiculously high standard he could never meet because of some event that he couldn't even remember? Was he the one who had been forced year after year to face trial after trial, each one more deadly than the last? For that matter, where was Ron Weasley when Harry's name had been chosen for that accursed tournament? Oh, that's right. He was off sulking for a whole month, under the mistaken impression that Harry had _asked_ for his celebrity and notoriety.

Was Ron the one who had spent a year thinking that his godfather was a twisted murderer who had betrayed his parents and was bent on killing him only to find out that, in fact, he was an innocent man who had spent twelve years in a cage of horrors for nothing? Was Ron the one who had learned that his parent's other friend, who had been presumed to be a victim of his godfather's killing spree, was actually the _real_ traitor who sold out his family to the power-hungry villain with the snake face? So Ron had lost a rat; big freakin' deal.

And for heaven's sake was it Ron Weasley who had thought he could leave the prison that was the Dursley's to live with his _real_ guardian only to have his chance taken from him by a vindictive professor and a politician bent on saving face with the public?

No, it wasn't Ron who had experienced those things. It wasn't Ron who watched a fellow student die and then was tortured by a risen dark lord. It wasn't Ron who spent a year as a public pariah, the government, the media, and his own peers thinking him to be an attention seeking fame whore. It wasn't Ron Weasley who was fooled by some fake dream that ended in the death of his godfather, the near death of five of his friends, and the consequent revelation by a headmaster who had kept his true destiny hidden from him for years.

And last but not least, Ron was not the one who was forced to witness the death of the headmaster at the hands of two long-hated rivals who he'd _tried_ to convince everyone could not be trusted. No, there was one more. It wasn't Ron who had been thrust against his will into a 'kill your enemy or die trying' battle. Ron Weasley thought he knew injustice. To hell with him. Ron Weasley knew _nothing_ of injustice.

Harry's eyes threatened to fill with tears as he mourned the path his life had taken and the loss of so many who were close to him. It had been so long that he had been holding this in. It had threatened to come out more than once. But he hadn't wanted to burden Hermione, who was already dealing with enough as it is.

And it was with this last thought that Harry started to form the list.

Removing a quill and some parchment from his rucksack he put his feelings down in writing.

People Who Have Abandoned Me

Lily and James Potter

The entire world (twice)

The Dursley's

Peter Pettigrew

Ron Weasley (twice)

Sirius Black (twice)

Albus Dumbledore (twice)

Remus Lupin

Harry glared at his list reproachfully. Deep down he knew he wasn't being exactly fair. Many of the people on the list had never _intentionally_ abandoned him. But Harry wasn't in the mood to be understanding. Interestingly, he noticed that there was one name that was conspicuously absent from the list of those who had left him behind.

"Harry?"

Hermione's voice rang out softly but clearly in the late night quiet. Harry looked up to see his female friend bundled in a gray winter coat and wrapped up in gloves and a scarf. Her cheeks were tinged pink with cold and it was obvious that she was shivering. Harry made a space for her on the couch.

"Come here. You look freezing."

Not needing to be told twice, Hermione swept across the room and hunkered down on the couch next to Harry where she leaned into his body, reveling in the warmth it was radiating. She gave him a small smile as he wrapped her up in a quilt blanket.

"Thanks Harry. I just couldn't stay out there any longer. It must be almost zero degrees outside!"

Harry nodded. "It's okay. I'd much rather you inside and functional than outside and frozen."

They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes, each lost in their own thoughts. Finally, Hermione looked up at her friend with a curious expression on her face.

"What were you writing when I came in? That's not something you do often."

"I was just thinking about…certain people. I made a rather selfish list."

Hermione was interested. "May I see it?"

Harry shifted uncomfortably. "It was pretty selfish of me Hermione. I don't want you to think badly of me."

For the first time since her return to the tent Hermione looked angry. "Harry James Potter, you know that I could _never_ think badly of you! I won't push you to show it to me but I would hope that you can trust your best friend."

Her words startled him. It was strange. He had known Hermione for more than six years but he had never thought of her as his best friend. She was always _one_ of his best friends, naturally; a part of the trio that had formed the nucleus of Harry's life since he was eleven years old. But it had always been Ron Harry thought of as his "best mate."

However, the more that Harry thought about it the more it seemed to make sense. Of all the people Harry knew, it was Hermione who he would describe as his rock, the lone stabilizing force in the life of the Chosen One. When he had needed help to understand practically anything in life, from schoolwork to the female mind, Hermione was his go to source. He had always chalked it up to her obvious brilliance and intelligence but maybe, just maybe, it ran deeper than that.

Harry considered her for a long while. Hermione blushed very faintly; she wasn't used to this kind of inspection from Harry.

Yes, Harry was starting to see. And as it dawned on him he wondered why he had never seen it before. Slowly, he pulled out the list and tilted it in order for Hermione to be able to see it.

"You've been warned" Harry said.

Hermione took the parchment in her hands and almost immediately looked back at Harry with a mixed gaze of reproach, compassion, and sadness.

"_Harry_" she admonished lightly. "Why would you write something like this?"

Harry shrugged. "I told you it was selfish."

Hermione sighed and looked back at the list. At first she couldn't believe the names he had written. But as she read further she took Harry's hand and squeezed it. _Her hands are soft_, Harry thought. _Still cold, but soft._

As she finished, Hermione looked up with tears in her eyes. "Harry, can we talk about this? Please?"

Harry stopped himself from rolling his eyes, settling on a shrug instead. "Not much to talk about" he muttered. "It is what it is."

"Harry, please. I'm worried about you. If this is the kind of thing you've been thinking about then I want to help you. Don't shut me out. Let me help you." The look in her eyes stopped Harry from putting her off. There was always something about those eyes that he couldn't resist, whether she was demanding that he study harder or pleading to accompany him on a dangerous adventure.

"Fine. What do you want to talk about?"

"Why do you feel this way?" By now Hermione had sat up straight and had shifted her body to be face to face with Harry. She had also maneuvered the blanket so that they both were covered with it.

"Well," Harry began, "let's see. Where to start…"

"Lily and James Potter. I guess they didn't really have much of a choice but they still left me behind. Then the entire world abandoned me when they just left me on the Dursley's doorstep without so much as a moment of consideration for what I might want. Then they did it again fifth year, when Fudge and Umbridge were trying to discredit me. I don't remember many outside sources coming to my defense that year."

Hermione listened intently. She could see that Harry was speaking from a wounded heart and that his perspective might be skewed. But she found it hard to disagree with his reasoning.

Harry continued. "The Dursley's go without saying. I mean, you'd think that maybe they could have at least tried to care. Aunt Petunia at the very least. I _was_ her sister's son after all. It's not like I ever did anything to them to make them hate me. Do you have any idea what it was like to be four years old and unable to understand why my cousin always got presents and I didn't? Why he got hugs and kisses and I didn't? Why he was never yelled at but I was constantly criticized and blamed for every single thing that went wrong? Why Dudley had free reign to do anything he wanted even though he was a horrible, lazy bully while I was locked in a _closet_ for hours at a time? If anyone could have made a difference it was the Dursley's. I can't even imagine how different I might be if they had actually treated me right."

Hermione's eyes filled with renewed tears which were now falling silently down her cheeks. Leave it to Harry to absolutely break her heart with his words.

"Who's next? Oh yeah, Pettigrew. He was one of my parent's friends. He knew me when I was a baby. He probably even held me before. But a big support he turned out to be. He sold us out and would have seen me killed without batting an eyelash. All to save his own miserable arse.

"Ron Weasley, that's another obvious one. Just when I needed my best friend the most he turned on me in fourth year. I'm sure you remember that. And why? Because he was jealous of the '_famous Harry Potter_?" he spat out those last words with enough venom to make Hermione flinch.

"And now he's gone again. Well good riddance, I say. We don't need him." It still hurt for Harry to say it but more and more he was beginning to feel that it was true. Hermione, for her part, hung her head as she was confronted with the evidence that Ron Weasley had, in fact, not been a very good friend.

"I'm sure Sirius probably surprised you but I feel like he abandoned me too. I mean, why couldn't he have just waited and let the Ministry sort Pettigrew out? Or Dumbledore? He could have told them that Peter could turn into a rat. He wouldn't have had to cop to anything himself. If he had just waited I might never have been sent to the Dursley's at all. I might have been raised by Sirius and had a halfway normal upbringing. But reckless Sirius just had to take matters into his own hands and get locked up for twelve years. Then he died. And I don't care what anyone says, I will _always_ blame myself for that. But why'd he have to go? For God's sake Hermione, why'd he have to go?"

This time it was Harry who struggled to hold back his tears, his shoulders shaking from the effort. It was uncomfortable, showing such emotion in front of Hermione. It made him feel vulnerable, weak. But Hermione threw her arms around him and pulled his head close to her heart.

"Shhh. It's okay Harry, it's alright. It wasn't your fault. None of it was your fault. Don't beat yourself up."

It took several moments for Harry to regain control of himself and when he did Hermione was reluctant to let him go. Harry squeezed her arm in silent thanks for her support.

Taking several deep breaths, Harry continued his explanation. "Let's see now. Albus Dumbledore; oh I've got a whole lot to say about Albus Dumbledore." For the first time Harry's features betrayed not just a sense of abandonment, but a sense of rage that Hermione had only seen a few times during their fifth year.

"Albus Dumbledore, our great and beloved headmaster. The Only One He Ever Feared. Albus Dumbledore was a brilliant strategist, no doubt, but he was terrible at reading people. Did you know that it was Snape who told You Know Who about that damned prophecy, or prediction, or whatever garbage it was? It was Snape's information that sent him after my parents. And Dumbledore not only accepted him back to our side, he actually _let him become a teacher!_ What was he playing at? How could he have been so stupid?"

Hermione gasped at this revelation, having never known of Snape's role in Harry's parent's deaths.

"And how could Dumbledore have not seen through that complete idiot Lockhart? Do you honestly think that Lockhart actually could fool Dumbledore? And yet for a whole year we were subjected to the most useless Defense lessons this side of Dolores Umbridge. And speaking of being fooled, how could Dumbledore have possibly _not known_ what Quirrell was up to? Even Snape figured it out. I think Snape actually did more to stop Quirrell than Dumbledore did.

"Glorious, trusting Dumbledore. He never trusted _me_ enough to tell me any of his plans; any of his ideas. He knew about the prophecy for nearly sixteen years and when did he decide to finally tell me? After leading my friends into near death and watching Sirius die. He didn't even so much as _look_ at me that whole year! Then he had to go and die himself. Shows you how well his trusting nature worked out for him."

Harry was positively seething with rage now. "And then I had to find out, _after_ his death mind you, that we both come from the same village. That his family and mine were buried in the same cemetery. He left us a bunch of mysterious gifts with no explanation and never once bothered to let me know about the connection we both shared! Don't you think that was something I might be interested in?!"

Harry cracked his thumbs as Hermione looked on, nearly bursting with hurt and rage and such a profound sense of loss that his bones felt weighed down.

"And last but not least, Lupin. Remus Lupin, my father's friend. The greatest Defense teacher we ever had. Call me crazy, plenty of people have, but Remus' attitude toward his wife and unborn child sure feel like abandonment to me. Only it's not just them he's abandoning. He's abandoned everything he taught me to stand for. So you tell me Hermione, am I being selfish? Is this just another example of 'Crazy Harry Potter' throwing a temper tantrum?"

Hermione sat motionless. There was nothing she could say, no words to ease Harry's pain; to mend his broken heart. For once in her life Hermione Granger felt completely useless. It was the most terrible feeling in the world.

"I'm sorry Hermione" Harry murmured. "I shouldn't be taking this out on you. It's not your fault; none of it is your fault. I don't blame you for anything. I'm just so frustrated. I was thinking about Ron earlier and it just got to me. I bet I sound pretty stupid don't I?"

It was his voice that did it. The sound of hopelessness and despair that sunk their teeth into Hermione's heart. She would never forgive Ron Weasley for what he had done to Harry. She was ashamed to admit that she had largely been mourning her own loss of her potential love interest since Ron's departure. She had never stopped to consider just what Ron's selfishness had done to Harry.

It really wasn't fair. Despite her detached treatment of Harry last school year Hermione knew that she had never had a better friend than Harry Potter. Why did so many bad things have to happen to him? Was he destined to suffer loss after loss until his arch nemesis had been dealt with? What kind of world was it where someone as selfless as Harry was made to lose everyone and everything that meant anything to him? And how could she, with any shred of decency, continue to keep her distance from Harry, fearful of how Ron might react? Ron was no longer here. It was Harry and her. Harry was all she had now and she was all he had. Never again would Hermione sacrifice their friendship for some frivolous romance that had never materialized.

"You're not stupid Harry and you're not crazy. I am so sorry that you have had to suffer like this. You don't deserve it. I…I can't help but feel that my name should be on that list as well. I've treated you terribly this past year. I'm ashamed of myself."

For the first time, Harry looked confused. "Why should your name be on the list? You've never abandoned me. You've been the only constant in my life ever since I've known you. I'd never have been able to make it so far if I didn't have you."

Hermione shook her head. "Harry, don't you remember last year at all? How _bitchy_ I was towards you? First it was that stupid book. I just couldn't stand the idea of you beating me at something. My selfish pride and vanity put a strain on our friendship. After all we'd been through together, I let a silly book derail the special relationship we'd shared. I'm ashamed of it."

Harry sat in stunned silence. He had been aware of Hermione's changed attitude during most of their sixth year. To be honest it had confused and hurt him. But he'd just assumed that she was angry with him for the fiasco he had gotten her involved in at the Ministry.

Hermione continued mournfully. "And of course I just wouldn't believe you when you tried to tell me about Malfoy and Snape. And of course you were right. And then there was how I treated you during…well, during the fling Ron had with Lavender. I was just so embarrassed that he so openly was kissing her after he'd already agreed to come to Slughorn's party with me. And after how badly I had been treating you over the book and Malfoy when you came to find me in that empty classroom…Oh Harry, I should have just made up with you right then and there! You were being a true friend, something I regret that I haven't been for you. Words cannot express how sorry I am for that."

Hermione finished her statement looking at Harry with a pleading expression. She so desperately wanted him to say that she was forgiven. But Harry had something quite different in mind.

"Hermione," he breathed with as much tenderness as he could muster, "I have never felt like you've abandoned me. I'll admit that I was confused about everything that happened last year. I did think that you were angry at me but I just assumed it was because I'd nearly gotten you killed at the Ministry."

Hermione's eyes grew wide.

"But I meant what I said. I've never felt abandoned by you. I've never forgotten who took me back in time to save Sirius or who stood by me when Ron and the rest of the school thought I'd tricked my way into becoming school champion, helping me prepare every day and night for every task.

"I've never forgotten how supportive you were of me fifth year when I was a piece of work to be around." Hermione smiled slightly at the memory of Harry's periodic outbursts during that year. Harry reached out and took both of her hands in his own. "And I'll never forget who it is that is still with me now. Even after everything that has happened. I mean it when I say that you are my rock Hermione. I would be lost without you."

Leaning in, he placed a soft kiss on her forehead as he pulled her into a tight embrace. Hermione's heart was racing. What was he trying to say?

After a while, Harry released her and said "I don't think I've ever shown you the appreciation you deserve." Hermione looked at him in puzzlement. Harry sighed.

"I know I, well, Ron and I, were always digging ourselves into academic holes. We just always assumed you'd bail us out. It wasn't fair to you. We hardly ever thanked you. Like I said, we just assumed you'd always help us…or do our work for us. We took you for granted. _I_ took you for granted. And don't even get me started on that whole Firebolt fiasco during third year. Even Hagrid came down on us for how we treated you. I'm sorry Hermione, for how I treated you. I think it's safe to say that I would be nothing if it weren't for you."

If there was anything better that Harry could have said, Hermione couldn't think of it. She had often wondered whether or not her two friends truly appreciated her efforts to keep them straight academically. Of course, Ron had always teased her, even borderline criticized her, for her relentless pursuit of her studies. But to hear these words from Harry now warmed her heart. It was validation of everything she had done for the last six years.

"Thank you Harry. That means so much coming from you. I know that you are always honest with me. I have no hard feelings. I hope that we can move past everything that happened in the past and make the best of the time we have together now. Your friendship means more to me than anything. Together, we'll complete this journey and defeat Him. I promise." This time it was she who leaned in to plant a kiss on Harry's cheek.

The two teens looked into each other's eyes for a long moment. They could each feel something. Both of them had taken it upon themselves to kiss the other. Chaste kisses, of course. But a kiss was still a kiss. For her part, Hermione had only ever kissed Harry once before; on his cheek at the end of their fourth year. Harry, however, had never kissed her before until tonight. Hermione's breath caught in her throat. It dawned on her that Harry Potter was the only boy she had ever kissed. She couldn't help a blush from rising in her cheeks.

Harry, meanwhile, observed that his body responded differently to Hermione's lips than to Ginny's or Cho's. With Cho there had been only the one kiss. Wet, unexpected, and therefore not that good. With Ginny there had been many kisses. Each one had sent a thrill through Harry's body but he had, even then, suspected that this was more due to the feeling of blissful normality that his life normally lacked than to any feeling of undying love.

But with Hermione the feeling was entirely different. It had now been twice that his cheeks had been the recipients of a Hermione Granger kiss. And Harry noted, especially this second time, that although his kisses with Hermione hadn't ever been in an intimate location, such as the lips, they seemed to carry more intimacy in them than all the kisses from Ginny and Cho combined.

Harry smiled at Hermione who smiled back uncertainly. The temperature inside the tent had warmed considerably. Hermione no longer felt the chill from the outdoors that had engulfed her earlier. Instead she was feeling flushed and she had an idea that it was because of the actions of her best friend.

"Thank you Hermione. For everything. Thank you for being the only one who's never left me."

Harry gently caressed her jaw and then stood up. "I'm going to go out and keep watch now. Try and get some sleep."

As he mulled around pulling on more layers, Hermione watched in a daze, trying desperately to think coherently but realizing that it was a losing battle.

Some time later, Hermione rose from her bed and quickly located a quill and parchment of her own. Her late night discussion with Harry had inspired her to take a look at herself and what she wanted out of life.

Taking a deep breath, Hermione set about creating a list.


	2. Who Do You Love?

**Author's Note:** Well, although I got no reviews last time I did get favorites and follows and plenty of story views so I'll assume that some people will read this. As promised, this is chapter two of 'The List.' I have in mind to write a concluding chapter, making this a 3-shot. However, I need some feedback on what any readers would like to see. So, what would you like to see as a final chapter?

1. Ron/Ginny's reactions?

2. Post-battle talks and plans?

3. Something else entirely?

Let me know what you would like and I'll try my best. Feedback is TREMENDOUSLY appreciated! By the way, I realize that Ron came out looking quite unlikable in chapter one and probably will in chapter two as well. It wasn't intentional; it's just how I feel about Ron's character. I don't know how to put a positive spin on much of his actions. Sorry to any Ron lovers.

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**The List**

** Chapter Two: Who Do You Love?**

Hermione's list was much shorter than Harry's; it took all of ten seconds to complete.

Who Do I Love?

Ron Weasley

Harry Potter

What a question! Hermione doubted whether Minerva McGonagall herself could have come up with a harder one. Most people had assumed that, given her closeness with her two male friends, that she would eventually become romantically involved with one of them. Even Hermione herself had come to this conclusion toward the end of her third year.

It just made sense. Why bother trying to get close to some guy she barely knew when she was already close to just enough guys that she could take her pick? Besides, their trio had been through amazing things together already by that point; who else could Hermione have shared her life with if not one of the boys who were with her through all those adventures. The problem, Hermione eventually realized, was that other girls were starting to notice Hermione's friends as well (particularly one). She realized she may not be able to just take her pick after all.

But back to the matter at hand. The pressing question, the one that _needed_ to be answered tonight (or was it early morning already?) was 'Just who was Hermione Granger in love with?'

In order to answer that question, she needed to know what qualities she was looking for in a man. So naturally, she made another list.

Ideal Qualities in a Boyfriend

Trust

Willingness to Communicate

Emotional Maturity

Mutual Respect

Someone Who is Passionate

Handsome

Hermione blushed slightly at the last item on her list but who was she trying to fool? Every girl wants to end up with a handsome man. Anyone who says that physical attractiveness is not at least a small factor is a liar. Examining the six qualities she most desired in a male, Hermione again read the names of her two longest male companions.

Between Harry and Ron, who did she trust most? Well that was a relatively simple question. Ron had already proven his untrustworthiness. Irresponsible with his schoolwork, negligent about his prefect duties, prone to jealousy, known to break promises (Slughorn's party comes to mind), and known to desert his friends when needed the most. No, Ron Weasley, Hermione decided, was not very trustworthy.

Harry, on the other hand, Hermione had never had a major problem with in this area. True, he too slacked off somewhat when it came to schoolwork, but never to the extent that Ron did. In fact, Hermione had read a great deal of Harry's papers and they were quite good. Harry's problem was that he could be easily distracted (hard to blame him with everything he had to deal with) and Ron was a large distraction. Harry had not been appointed a prefect (Hermione was still in shock over that one) but had proven quite capable as his team's captain on that damn sports team. So all in all Harry was conscientious about his duties and responsibilities.

As far as the personal level of trust between Harry and Hermione, Hermione recalled a frightening ride on the back of a wild animal that she certainly would not have been as comfortable undertaking if Ron had been her partner. She recalled her implicit trust in Harry's abilities to teach the D.A., her willingness to follow his lead that night at the Ministry, and her willingness to work alongside him on their present journey. For his part, Harry usually deferred to Hermione's judgment in areas that she was more knowledgeable about, which showed that he was trusting of her. Certainly, from their first year on they had entrusted one another with their lives.

Okay. Harry was the clear winner on point number one. Now, which of the two boys displayed more of a willingness to communicate? Another easy answer: Harry, by far. Ron never opened up to Hermione about what he was thinking, unless it was about something frivolous like sports or food. And who was the one that always got touchy whenever she would coax them to try harder at something? But Harry was always willing to divulge his feelings (most of the time) to Hermione. And he certainly was the most patient whenever she went on one of her rants. Far more than Ron, anyway.

Emotional Maturity? Again, no contest. Although Harry did have is issues (heated outbursts when under tremendous pressure) he was certainly more attuned to Hermione's feelings and emotions, and just people's emotions in general, than was Ron. Although Ron had started to display hints of maturity before he stormed out of their lives a few weeks ago, Harry had demonstrated a maturity beyond his years for some time now. Just the fact that Ron had been willing to unceremoniously ditch Hermione last year for a hot blonde with big breasts and a pretty face was proof enough of his immaturity. You simply don't do something like that to someone you supposedly fancy.

Next: Mutual Respect. Another easy one. While Ron had displayed a willingness to defend her against people like Malfoy and Snape, his everyday interactions with her were sarcastic at best. How often had Ron teased her about her passion for her schoolwork or for her other passion, S.P.E.W.? Harry, though, had never done that. He was usually the perfect gentleman. His attempt to comfort her after the Lavender incident was a prime example of this. As a result, it was once again Harry who had earned her respect.

Someone who is Passionate: Hmm…on this point both men had their merits. Ron was passionate about sports, food, and…well, he _had_ been passionate about helping Harry. But obviously that was over. On second thought, perhaps it wasn't as close as she had originally thought.

Harry clearly was passionate. She recalled with fondness his intense drive to learn how to repel Dementors, even though it was far beyond his typical skill level. His passion to do all he could to win that wretched tournament had provided Hermione with many occasions to praise him. Certainly, Harry was passionate about defense. He was passionate for those he loved, those few whom he allowed into his heart. Hermione glowed that she was one of them.

Yes, Harry was quite passionate.

Last but not least, handsome. If Hermione was honest with herself she would admit that, at last, both men really did have their merits. Ron was bigger than Harry, both taller and more muscular. His red hair and freckles, which had once made him appear goofy, had actually turned into quite the attractive wreath if one was looking hard enough.

But Hermione recalled with butterflies with whom she had felt her first real attraction way back in the third year. That ride on Buckbeak was a thrill she would never forget. Huddled up close behind Harry, it was the first time Hermione had noticed that her friend was starting to grow up.

Over the years he had matured from the small, skinny young boy she had first known, into quite a looker himself. His unruly, raven hair was the kind of thing that adolescent girls just loved to giggle about. His years of playing his favorite sport had given him an appreciation for other, more mundane physical activities and as a result had transformed him into quite the athlete. And those eyes…Hermione could not count the number of times she had heard girls of nearly every year sighing about how beautiful were his eyes.

Yes, both of these men were handsome. She decided not to decide who was the more so just yet. Based on her criteria, with whom would she be more compatible? It took her all of two seconds to figure it out.

Of course it would be Harry. It made sense. She had always found it easier to talk to Harry than anyone else. Harry was the intellectual choice.

But was he the right choice? Hermione was reminded of the words of their dead headmaster. She had to choose between what was right and what was easy. Harry was the easy choice. It _made sense_ to be with him. But again, was he the right choice?

Hermione certainly could not deny that she had spent much of the last year pursuing Ron. She also could not deny that the small changes in his behavior earlier this year had tended to impress her. She had hoped that he was finally starting to come around. Yes there was no doubt: Hermione had definitely harbored feelings for Ron.

But his behavior since then had been nothing short of appalling. He was always complaining, was critical of everyone and everything, self-concerned, unhelpful, short of temper, and disloyal. He had been everything that a boyfriend or husband should _not be_. And now he was gone. Absent. Yes, she had harbored feelings for him before. But as of right now, and especially in light of Harry's revelations from earlier, she wanted nothing to do with Ron Weasley.

And of course, Hermione remembered things from earlier years. Feelings of hers that had not been directed at the youngest Weasley son.

Again, her first awareness of physical attraction to a boy had been when riding Buckbeak with Harry. When she had received her letter later in the summer announcing the need for dress robes, she had immediately deduced a formal occasion of some sort. And which boy had automatically popped into her mind? It was Harry.

For what purpose had she subtly directed Harry to take a friend as a date to the ball? To try and get him to ask her. Whose heart sank when she was told that Harry had asked Cho to be his date (even though he was turned down)? Hermione's heart. Whose reaction had she been seeking when she arrived for the ball in her formal attire? Harry's. And whose awareness was she trying to stir to her feelings last year when she had literally told Harry that he was "very fanciable"? Yes, although she had tried to pursue Ron, it was Harry Potter who had first claimed her heart and on whom she had thought she had given up hope.

Hermione leaned back as the realization finally dawned on her. It was Harry. It had been all along. Whatever feelings she had once harbored for Ron were gone. Harry Potter was the sole man in her life and she couldn't see it any other way. Suddenly her heart began to flutter. Harry was just outside; she could call for him and in an instant he would be here. He would come running. She could tell him; she _should_ tell him her feelings.

Only one thing was stopping her: Ginny.

The youngest Weasley offspring, the gorgeous only daughter, still had a hold over Harry's heart, even after being separated from him for half a year. Hermione frowned as the memory of Harry pulling out the Marauder's Map nearly every night came back to her. Of course he was checking on Ginny, using the map as a conduit to get as close as he could get to the love of his life without actually communicating with her. Hermione sighed in frustration. There was nothing she could do to change Harry's feelings for the petite redhead. And even if she could, she wouldn't.

Hermione Granger was a woman with morals. She would not take advantage of Ginny's absence to secure a relationship with Harry. Nor would she use Harry's own weakened defenses, after months away from his girlfriend and his natural need for affection, to usurp Ginny's place in Harry's heart. No, she would not come between the love of her two friends. Even if it broke her heart to do nothing.

Fighting back another round of tears, Hermione shook her head ruefully. It just wasn't fair! When did Hermione ever ask for anything? When did she ever pursue her own interests, her own desires? When did Hermione ever do anything at all for herself? She was always sacrificing her own happiness for the sake of her friends, whether it was time with her family (or even _having_ a family now that her parents were effectively out of her life in Australia), summer vacations that could have been spent on the beach, evenings spent helping Harry and Ron keep up with their homework when a nice relaxing bath would have been preferable, and for that matter, even trying to start a relationship with Ron when it was Harry whom she had really wanted.

On the whole, Hermione thought that she had been quite accommodating of everyone else's wants and needs over the years and damn it all if Hermione didn't deserve some happiness of her own!

But she couldn't, she just couldn't. It wouldn't be right. However much she might want it, the thrill of working to steer Harry's heart away from Ginny and toward herself, the feeling of Harry's hands on her skin, his lips entwined with hers, and the warmth that would come from spending every night in Harry's arms instead of alone, she would not compromise her principles of right and wrong. And romancing a man who was involved with one of her closest friends was just wrong. Why did the one thing Hermione wanted more than anything have to be the one thing that was unequivocally out of reach?

Or was it?

A thought had suddenly occurred to Hermione. And her brilliant mind being what it was, the appearance of one thought quickly became connected to several more like it as a potentially illuminating line of reasoning consumed her.

Harry was not technically _with_ Ginny anymore. Hadn't he broken up with her at the end of their sixth (Ginny's fifth) year? Hadn't he told her in no uncertain terms that as long as his great enemy was at large he could not be with her? Wasn't it true that Harry hadn't exchanged any communication with Ginny since they were forced to leave the Burrow over six months ago? Granted, circumstances did not permit any such correspondence, but still. And wasn't it possible that Harry's frequent consultation of the Marauders Map could be an attempt to learn the whereabouts of any of their other friends and acquaintances that they had left behind at school? Were not Neville, Luna, Hagrid, and even Professor McGonagall important enough for Harry to want to check up on? In fact, had Harry ever actually said anything at all about Ginny in all the time that they had been abroad together?

Hermione pondered the implications of this information for several minutes. Finally, she was convinced that her logic was sound. Harry was not technically taken. That much was true. Harry and Ginny's relationship was over. Perhaps they planned on restarting it when this was all over, but plans can change. Hermione decided that she could not simply give up without really trying. She had had enough of denying her feelings for her best friend. There was no daunting tournament hanging over their heads anymore, nor pretty Asian girls to distract them (or him, rather), nor was there a Ron or Ginny Weasley to put a damper on her desires. All there was, was Hermione and Harry living together in a tent in the wilderness struggling to keep each other alive.

It was a desperate situation. And desperate times called for desperate measures.

"Harry?" Hermione called his name loud enough for him to be able to hear her while he was outside. Within moments, Hermione could hear his footfalls as he burst into the tent looking worried and (was she imagining it?) desirous.

"Hermione, what's wrong? Are you okay?" He looked at her expectantly, silently demanding to know why she had called him in so early from his watch.

"Nothing's wrong Harry; I'm fine. Well, actually, that's not entirely true. There's something I need to talk with you about and I'm not sure how you're going to take it. But I've been thinking about it and decided it can't wait any longer."

Harry's face paled as his eyes grew wide with fear. "Hermione? Hermione, please…I…think I know what you're talking about. Please, I know that things haven't been going so well lately and I know you must be disappointed that I haven't been the leader you'd hoped I would be, but please don't give up on me yet. I…I can't do this without you."

Hermione's mouth had opened ever so slightly during Harry's mournful pleading and she quickly shook her head in denial. "No Harry! No that's not it at all! I would never leave you behind! And I am _not _disappointed in you at all. Harry, under the circumstances you've done quite well. Let's be honest, Dumbledore really didn't prepare you much for this assignment. I have faith in you and I will _never_ abandon you."

Harry heaved an enormous sigh of relief at her confession. "I'm sorry Hermione. I just got myself so worked up over that stupid list I wrote. And out there I was still thinking about Ron and I just panicked. I'm really sorry."

Hermione resolved firmly in her heart to rip Ron Weasley a new one if she ever saw him again. But she kept her gaze soft as she addressed Harry.

"It's okay, I understand. Actually, what I wanted to talk to you about was Ginny."

Harry looked puzzled for a moment and regarded Hermione questioningly. "Ginny? What for?"

Hermione braced herself. She needed to be brave for this. "Harry, I know it may embarrass you to talk about this with me, but we're both adults here. And I think you'll agree that after living in such close quarters for so long there isn't much we don't know about one another." Harry continued to look puzzled so Hermione continued.

"Harry, I know how hard it must have been for you to break up with Ginny at the end of last school year. I could tell you really liked her; it was obvious how happy she made you." Harry looked down sheepishly and wondered what on earth Hermione was getting at.

"I also know that as a seventeen year old male, you have needs that are not being filled right now."

"Hermione!" was Harry's astonished reply. When had his friend become so forward?

Hermione just brushed it off. "Harry, it's nothing to be embarrassed about. I'm not talking about sex or anything. I just mean that you went from being in a committed relationship to not in a matter of weeks, not because that's what you wanted but because of circumstances beyond your control. It stands to reason that you'd want to enjoy all those things you did with Ginny. Holding her hand, hugging her…and kissing her as well" she added almost as an afterthought.

"But she's not here to do that for you. And to be perfectly honest, you are the reason for that. You were the one who expressly told her that she was not allowed to come along with us on our journey. And, whether you wanted to or not, you were the one that broke up with her. I'm not coming down on you Harry. In fact, I think your decision to call it quits with Ginny was one of the noblest and most selfless things done by anyone I've ever known. You sacrificed your own happiness for the sake of someone else. I hope you realize how few people would have the courage to do that. You are an exceptionally rare man Harry Potter."

Harry simply stared at his friend, suddenly aware that the temperature in the tent seemed to have gone up about ten degrees. "Wow. Thanks Hermione. I…I don't know what to say. But…why are you telling me this?"

Hermione took a deep breath before responding. "Harry, why do you look at the Marauders Map every night?"

"Huh? The map? I…I guess I do it just to check on people, you know? It makes me feel somehow connected to them. Like as long as I know where they all are I'm not completely isolated from the outside world."

Hermione nodded. "And who do you look for when you look at the map?"

"I look for lots of people. Hagrid and Neville, Luna, Seamus, McGonagall, even Dobby. Of course Ginny too. What's this about Hermione?"

"So you don't look at the map exclusively to find out about Ginny?"

"Not exclusively, no."

"And how do you feel about her now that the two of you haven't communicated for more than half a year? Do you still consider her your girlfriend?"

Harry was taken aback at this abrupt line of questioning. He had been grilled by Hermione before but never about anything this personal. "I…don't know what I feel. At first I felt the same as I did at the end of last year; trying desperately to convince myself that breaking up really was the best thing to do. Now…the doubt isn't there. I know for sure I made the right choice. Things would just be too complicated if Ginny and I were trying to still be boyfriend and girlfriend through all of this."

Hermione nodded again. "What about my last question? Do you still consider her your girlfriend?"

Harry still could not understand where Hermione was going with this. He was tempted to tell her that his feelings about Ginny were private but held back. He had learned long ago that there was always a reason for the things Hermione did. He just had to be patient before being amazed.

"You know Hermione, I know I'm not the most socially graceful guy in the world. But I'm pretty sure even I know that when a guy breaks up with a girl it means that she is no longer his girlfriend."

"Don't sell yourself short Harry. But you didn't break up for the ordinary reasons guys and girls break up. You didn't fight; there was no major event that told you that she wasn't the one for you. You broke up because you felt you had to. Like I said, you were being selfless. You were trying to protect her. So because you didn't want to break up in the first place, do you find it hard to think of yourself as single?"

This, Harry thought, was a rather interesting question. When he thought about it he was surprised. He was, technically, a single man. He was not bound to anyone anymore than he had been before dating Ginny. On the other hand, Hermione was right. Their breakup had been born of necessity, not out of want. There was no doubt that Harry still had feelings for Ginny. But as for what those feelings were? That part was hard to discern. He no longer felt the aching in his heart at Ginny's absence. He no longer went to bed every night thinking about her, fantasizing about being with her when this was all over. He had actually not given much thought to Ginny, other than looking for her dot on the map in quite some time. In fact, most of his thoughts during his free time had been focused on the girl in front of him now: Hermione.

First it had been thoughts of how to comfort her and cheer her up after Ron had left. Then it had been how to try and regain the sense of normalcy between them that had been missing for quite some time, ever since the beginning of sixth year, and was unattainable during Ron's presence. Most recently his thoughts had been preoccupied with worry that as their quest rolled on seemingly without end, Hermione would be tempted to pull a Ron and leave him, hence his bitter list and mistaken assumptions from not long ago.

"I guess I haven't actually thought about it" Harry said finally. "But when it comes down to it…yes, I'm single. I am not in a relationship with anyone and there's no evidence that I will be any time soon."

Hermione's heart leaped at finally receiving an answer to her inquiry, and what an interesting answer it was.

"What about you?" Harry asked as Hermione snapped from her thoughts.

"What? What do you mean?"

"Well, I don't want to bring up anything painful but…all last year you were actively pursuing Ron. It was quite a situation to be stuck in the middle of." Hermione went red at the memory of she had acted the previous year.

"And I was sure the two of you were going to get together on this trip. But obviously things happened. I guess what I'm wondering is, are you still thinking about becoming involved with Ron? Because if so…well, I respect your right to make your own decisions, but I may have a couple of things to say about that."

Hermione's eyes grew wider as she tried to determine the meaning of Harry's words. She decided to leave it be for now.

"I won't try to deny it Harry. Last year I acted like a fool. We've already talked about my behavior towards you tonight. I regret that more than anything. But the situation with Ron…oh Harry, it's just so embarrassing! I tried so hard to get him to notice me and it seemed like it was working until Lavender came along. I've never been more humiliated in my entire life. And to think that I was still willing to try and be with him after that…Ugh!"

Hermione let out a sound halfway between a screech and a groan of disgust. "To answer your question Harry, no, I'm done with Ron. If he ever comes to his senses I'll try to forgive him for all that he's done but he can forget about there _ever_ being a chance to have a relationship with me. I realize now that it never would have worked anyway, even if he had been more attentive. He is everything that I'm not and we could hardly ever agree on anything. Could you imagine if I was married to him? Having to be subjected to his taunts and jabs at my passions every day? Being put down for being thorough, being called 'mental' because I think all intelligent creatures deserve respect? Honestly, him leaving is the best thing that could have ever happened to me."

Hermione noticed immediately that she had said the wrong thing. "Oh Harry I didn't mean it like that! I know he's your best friend and you miss him terribly. I'm so sorry Harry, I-" But she was cut off by Harry's finger pressed against her lips.

"It's okay Hermione. I agree with you. I'm not going to lie and say that I don't miss him a little, but the thought of how he treated you is enough to make me want to find him and tear him apart. I'm quite glad he won't be able to string you along anymore."

"Oh Harry you're a sweetheart. If I were a certain kind of girl I'd kiss you right now."

A sly look claimed Harry's face. "Well I _am_ single. What's stopping you?"

Hermione's breath caught in her throat. "Harry?" she barely whispered.

Realizing the effect of his words Harry tried to clean things up. "Relax Hermione. I certainly didn't mean that I expect you to kiss me. I'd never take advantage of you like that. I was only trying to lighten the mood. I guess I can be pretty clueless sometimes."

Hermione was struggling to contain her beating heart. "Harry, do you know why I asked you those questions earlier about you and Ginny?"

"Actually I've been wondering that for a while now."

"I…I didn't want to presume. But I just…I just want you to be happy. More than anyone you deserve to have everything you could ever want. And if…if you wanted to…since you called it quits with Ginny…I could fill that role for you."

Of all the things Harry thought he might hear, this wasn't it. "Hermione?" His eyes bugged as his female friend drew closer. His wonderful female friend who just happened to be wearing a white nightshirt that, in the winter chill, despite the heat they had in the tent, left little to the imagination.

"Harry, you don't know how long I've wanted to tell you this. I…I fancy you. I think I always have, at least since the end of third year. Gosh, somehow that word doesn't even begin to come close to how I feel about you. The first time I ever realized that I was attracted to a boy was when I was with you rescuing Sirius. I so desperately wanted you to ask me to go with you to the ball in fourth year. There were so many times I wanted to tell you how I felt but the timing just didn't seem right or I couldn't get the courage.

"I tried showing you a few times. When I kissed you goodbye after fourth year, when I hugged you the first time I saw you at Grimmauld Place, when I admitted to you that you were fanciable last year. Oh Harry I've been such an idiot! All that time I spent chasing Ron I was only doing it because I'd convinced myself that you just weren't interested! You are the most stubborn boy I've ever met! I'd kissed you, I'd thrown myself into your arms, I'd told you to your face that you were desirable but you still didn't get it.

"I thought Ron was the safer option so I decided to pursue him instead. I can't tell you the number of times I've had to stop myself from crawling into bed with you since he's been gone. Not because of anything sexual" she added, seeing the stunned look on Harry's face, "although I'd be lying if I told you that I'm not physically attracted to you. With Ron gone and Ginny out of the way I've had every opportunity to show you how I feel but I've never taken it. Until now. I just couldn't bring myself to go through another embarrassment if you weren't interested and I didn't want to come between you and Ginny. That's why I asked those questions Harry.

"So now you know. I don't expect you to necessarily jump at the chance of being with me. But, please, just consider it-" Once more she was cut off by Harry's finger on her lips.

"Hermione, I love you."

"Wh-what?"

"Oh, come on Hermione, you know I love you. I always have. Yes, it's always been as friends but it's still love. I'm…I'm really shocked by what you just told me. I never imagined. I'd be lying _to you_ if I said you weren't hot or that you didn't appeal to me. But…there's so much hanging over us right now. And other things left unresolved. I'd hate to start something with you and then have something awful happen like one of us dying. It's like I told you, I could never make it without you. That's something I can't say about anyone else."

Hermione's eyes were shining with hope, but where would this lead them? "What does this mean for us?" she asked.

Harry looked nervous. "I'd…well, as I said, I love you. Up until now it has always been as friends but…I'm willing to see if that might change into something deeper. You're my best friend Hermione. I realize now that you always have been. I've just been too blind to notice. Apparently, that goes for a lot of things. But I want to go slow. Disaster could strike at any time. Let's not get too involved unless we're absolutely sure it's what we both want."

"Harry Potter, what did I ever do to deserve you as a friend?"

"Hermione Granger, I assure you, you have been a gift _to me_. All these years sticking by my side through everything. I cannot express how much you mean to me."

They were silent for a moment. Then Hermione formed a sly smile of her own. "So Mr. Potter, how do you think we should go about exploring the next level of our relationship?"

Harry smirked cheekily. "Well, Miss Granger. I would be honored if you would allow me to steal a quick kiss."

"I think we can arrange that. Although who says it needs to be quick? I…well, I've never actually kissed anyone before, on the lips." She looked up embarrassingly to gauge Harry's reaction.

Harry was surprised. "Really? I thought Krum…?"

"Victor? Oh heavens, no! He kissed me on the cheek after the ball but that was it. No Harry, I assure you, I have never been kissed like that before. In fact, the only boy _I've_ ever kissed is you."

Harry smiled. "Really? Let's keep it that way."

The two friends leaned in slowly and shared with one another a soft, chaste kiss that was at once, innocent, and tantalizing, holding promise of more to come. As they pulled away, Hermione sighed contentedly.

"I think I could get used to that."

"I'm glad you approve Hermione."

"How'd I do?"

"Wonderful. Although I think we should try again."

"You're a mess Harry Potter."

"I think I should write lists more often."

Hermione lightly slapped his arm but soon gave in as her lips became fused to Harry's, the night promising to end much better than it had begun.

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**A/N #2:** Again, I really enjoy feedback. Even the slightest suggestion, critique, whatever would be appreciated. Thanks.


	3. What Is and What Should Never Be

**Author's Note:** Wow! I'm very surprised by how positive the reaction has been to this story. I've sent PM's to a few of you have reviewed to address a couple concerns so hopefully you've gotten them. To all who have read/followed/favorited/reviewed this story thank you so much. Super cool of you :)

Having said that, I've decided to very slightly amend the length of this fic. Originally this was going to be the final chapter but I felt that some of the additional material I wrote just didn't work with the rest of the material in this chapter. So, an epilogue of sorts should be posted next week. Again, thanks so much for the support!

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**The List**

**What Is and What Should Never Be**

"Wait here" Harry said to their unexpected visitor. Although Harry was quite glad to be alive after the near suicidal plunge into the lake's icy depths, and quite relieved to have finally destroyed that damn locket, he was not at all happy about breaking the news to Hermione. Why? Although she'd likely be thrilled that the locket was now gone, Harry was sure she would be furious at their new arrival, not to mention the fact that Harry had probably overlooked about six more convenient ways to get to the sword of Gryffindor.

And honestly, Harry was not sure what to make of Ron's sudden return either. Discovering a newfound sense of charity that he blamed on Dumbledore's influence, Harry acknowledged that without Ron's assistance he probably would have gone into shock in the middle of the lake and drowned. And it _was_ Ron who had actually destroyed the locket after all; notwithstanding that awkward scene where images of Harry and Hermione had engaged in some positively salacious activities that had produced two very different reactions. Harry had positively blushed crimson and was grateful for the covering of night to hide his reaction. Ron had been furious and nearly allowed that image to ruin the whole event.

It was clear that Ron still harbored some feelings for Hermione, whatever feelings they were, and Harry was not anticipating having to break the news to him that he and the girl in question were now romantically involved.

Having Ron wait at the entrance of the tent while he woke Hermione seemed to be the wisest course of action.

"Hermione. Hermione, wake up." Hermione stirred but gave a small moan of displeasure at being roused from her slumber. Her eyes remained closed and Harry had to stop himself from smirking at her little moan. "Hermione, come on. I need for you to wake up, this is important."

Hermione's eyes opened blearily as she gazed at the unfocused form of her boyfriend. "Harry? It's the middle of the night; why don't you come to bed?" In her daze she forgot that one of them had to remain on guard duty at almost all times. She tried to pull Harry closer to her but Harry stopped her gently but firmly.

"Hermione, I'm sorry to have to wake you but I've got some news. I really think you'll want to hear it." To be honest he was only sure that she'd want to hear one, maybe two, bits of the news that he had brought her.

Huffing softly, Hermione rose from her back to sit and face Harry. "What is it?" she asked sleepily.

"Do you want the good news first or the 'I'm-not-sure-how-you're-going-to-take-this' news?"

Hermione stared at the still hazy outline of Harry Potter confusedly. Finally she groaned 'Ugh, good news. We need some good news."

Harry smiled at her. "Okay. The locket has been destroyed and I have the sword of Gryffindor."

Well that woke her up. "What!?" she exclaimed. "But Harry, how? Did someone give it to you? Are you sure it's the real thing? Did you use it to destroy the locket? Why are you _wet_? Are you alright? You must be freezing!"

Harry grinned as she set about warming him up using several different methods. His favorite was when she threw herself into him to try and transfer some of her body heat to him.

"Whoa, let's take one question at a time. First, the sword was lying at the bottom of that lake a few hundred yards from camp. Someone must have left it there for us, there's no other explanation for it being there. Second, I'm definitely sure it's the real deal because it successfully got rid of the 'crux. I'm wet because I had to dive into the lake to retrieve the sword, which in hindsight was probably a bad idea. But I'm fine Hermione. Really, I am."

Hermione quickly gained a look of concentration. "So that's three down" she whispered quietly. "We're halfway there Harry! Oh I'm so proud of you!" She was about to give him a long, congratulatory kiss but Harry stopped her lips with his finger.

"Thank you for your enthusiasm but there's more to it than that. Are you ready for that other bit of news?" The look on his face told her that this other piece of information would probably not be met with the same enthusiasm.

"What is it?"

"We have a visitor."

Hermione narrowed her eyes in confusion. A visitor? How could they have a visitor? No one knew where to find them. "Who is it?"

"Come out to the main tent and you'll see."

Hermione followed Harry out of her bedroom and into the main, for lack of a better word 'living room' of their tent. Something told her that she wasn't going to like what she was about to see so she took hold of Harry's hand for support.

_Oh boy_, Harry thought to himself. _I'm sure he'll love to see us like this_. Within seconds, Harry and Hermione found themselves face to face with Ronald Weasley, who was waiting for them near the entrance of the tent. The look that passed across his features at the sight of the pair holding hands was not a welcome sight.

The three of them stood there staring (or in Hermione's case, glaring) at one another. Awkward was not even the word for it.

Finally, after several moments of uncomfortable silence, Harry said "He came while I was trying to get to the sword. He pulled me out of the lake and saved my life. And…" he paused, unsure of how much more to tell of their encounter by the lake, "…and he destroyed the locket. With the sword."

Ron shuffled his feet uncomfortably at the intensity with which Hermione was fixing him with her gaze. Truthfully, it took a lot to really frighten Ron Weasley these days. He'd fought against killer plants, giant chess boards, vindictive professors, convicted murderers, and the like. But in more than seven years of knowing Hermione Granger he had never felt so small under her gaze as he did right now. To his great surprise, Harry was still standing next to her, apparently oblivious to the coming explosion.

Undetected by Ron, Hermione gave Harry's hand a soft squeeze, which Harry interpreted as a signal to release her. As he did, Hermione walked slowly and methodically over to the tall redhead who admirably did not back down. Slowly, she reached her right hand out to touch the side of his cheek. Her face had an almost dreamlike quality to it, almost as if she could not believe what she was seeing. Of all the reactions Ron had expected from his kinda-sorta girlfriend, a stroke on the cheek was not it. Even Harry was momentarily put-out by what he was seeing.

SMACK! Now that's more like it.

Hermione let out a shriek of rage that would have frightened Tom Riddle himself if he had not been prepared for it. Swinging her fists with all of her might Hermione wailed away at the hastily retreating Weasley, intent on causing him as much physical damage as he had caused emotionally.

"HOW DARE YOU, YOU STUPID PRAT, YOU MISERBALE BLOODY TRAITOR!"

"Oww, Hermione! Agh! What are you…?"

"Do you have _any idea_ the pain you've caused?! Do you?! Do you even care?!"

Harry was torn between letting Hermione unload all of her frustrations and intervening on Ron's behalf. He decided that Ron deserved a good lashing and resolved to intervene after Hermione had gotten few more licks in.

Ron, for his part, was covering his face with his forearms, hoping against hope that Hermione's shots would not reach below the belt.

"You left us! You walked out on us! You nearly _destroyed_ us! You spat in the face of seven years of our friendship! What was it _this time_, Ronald? How did we wound your ego this time? Was it Harry? Did the fact that I was trying to encourage Harry wound your pride? Was it the fact that you just couldn't handle roughing it out in the wilderness while Harry and I were managing just fine? Or was it _my cooking_ you didn't like? You finally were getting a taste of what you thought would be your future: Domestic Hermione cooking you dinner and you didn't have the stomach for it? Preferred to run home to Mommy is that it?!"

Hermione was positively seething with rage and bitter animosity. There was nothing she would not say to Ron now. She had no reason to hold back. She had no thought to spare him for the sake of their romance; there was no romance. She was perfectly content to rip Ron Weasley a new one just as she had vowed she would do the night she and Harry became a couple.

"Hermione, I'm sorry-" Ron tried to say.

"SORRY? YOU'RE SORRY? Oh Harry, would you listen to that! He's _sorry_. You don't know a damn thing about being sorry Ron Weasley! You think you're sorry? I'll tell you something: _I'm_ the one who's sorry.

"_I'm sorry_ I ever trusted you. I'm sorry I ever thought that we could somehow work out our differences and try to be good together. I'm sorry I ever deceived myself into thinking that you would change one day. And _I'm sorry_ that I wasted the entirety of sixth year ignoring that man over there" she pointed to Harry, "just to try and score points with you're sorry arse! Did you think that you could just come back and have everything go back to how it was before? Were you hoping it would be like it's always been? Ron screws up but Harry and Hermione forgive him because without him there would be no 'Golden Trio'?

"I've got news for you Ron Weasley: Harry and I managed just fine without you. In fact, I'm not sure why you're even here. We don't need you. Turns out you're not so indispensible after all. It's not as if we haven't had loads of practice in dealing with you abandoning us. You abandoned Harry in fourth year. You abandoned me last year and both of us this year. So just leave Ron! Get out before I have a change of heart and decide to permanently rearrange your looks. GET OUT!"

Ron stood there flabbergasted. He had never seen Hermione in such a rage before. And normally Harry would have stepped in to try to head her off but this time he just stood there and let her go. _Miserable ingrate! I just saved his life!_ Ron thought to himself.

"Hermione" said Harry softly. "I know you're angry at him; livid, even. So am I. But he deserves a chance to explain himself. I'm not asking you to forgive him or act like nothing ever happened. But he _did_ just save my life. I'm interested to hear what he's doing here after all this time. Six weeks is a long time to be away" he said coldly, making it clear that the last sentence was directed at Ron.

Hermione inhaled deeply several times before shooting Ron a final murderous glare. Then she stalked off to stand next to Harry in a show of solidarity.

Ron looked between his two friends (could he even call them that now?) knowing that he deserved their anger. He wasn't quite so sure that he deserved to be smacked around like he just had been but decided arguing would do him no good in getting back into Hermione's good graces.

"Look guys," Ron began, "I know that I acted stupid. I never should have left you guys. I allowed my emotions to get the better of me and I reacted. I shouldn't have. I'm sorry that I walked out on you and I'm sorry that I said those awful things"

Hermione rolled her eyes but Harry was gazing directly at him. Ron continued.

"For what it's worth, I wanted to come back almost as soon as I left but I ran into a gang of Snatchers."

"What?" asked Harry.

"Snatchers. They're loose gangs of, for lack of a better term 'bounty hunters' that capture people wanted by the Ministry to turn them over to the prison camps that have been set up. The three of us are the most wanted fugitives in Britain right now. The Ministry is operating under You Know Who's thumb. They almost turned me over to Umbridge but I managed to fight my way out of it."

Both Harry and Hermione digested this information. This was one more danger they would have to watch out for. Ron's story made him slightly more sympathetic, but Harry still had some questions.

"Okay, so you were caught by Snatchers right after you left us?"

"Yeah."

"And how long before you escaped?"

"About twenty minutes."

"And it's taken you six weeks to try and rejoin us?" The implication was clear. For someone who supposedly wanted to come back as soon as he had departed he sure had taken his sweet time.

Ron caught the implication. "Look, I had things I wanted to check on. My family, for instance. You know there are Death Eaters teaching at school now. I needed to make sure Ginny was alright."

"And is she?" Harry asked.

"For the most part."

"Good to know. What else did you need to check on?"

"That was mainly it. I spent most of my time trying to find the two of you. You have no idea how well concealed you guys are." He chanced a glance at Hermione, hoping that she would detect that his statement was a compliment on her concealment skills. Unfortunately, Hermione seemed not to have noticed as she was busy stroking Harry's back. Ron looked away quickly.

"So how did you finally find us tonight?"

"The deluminator Dumbledore left me. I heard your voices coming from it. You…well, you guys sounded pretty happy. Then I heard Hermione say something about the Forest of Dean. It was like a message so I ran with it. I came here almost immediately. I've actually been searching for you guys for a couple of days. Like I said, you're very well concealed."

"You heard our voices out of the deluminator?" Hermione asked skeptically, speaking for the first time since allowing Ron to explain his actions.

Ron nodded his head. "I knew I'd probably never get an opportunity like it again so I seized it. And I'm glad I did. If I hadn't been out there Harry would have died tonight."

In her anger, Hermione decided to ignore the mention of Ron's heroics. Instead she turned to Harry and asked "So what happened when the locket was destroyed? Anything interesting?"

Harry looked uneasy and caught eyes briefly with Ron. Ron closed his eyes and sighed, apparently giving his consent for Harry to say whatever he felt needed to be said. _She can't get any more angry at me than she already is_ he thought.

Harry rubbed the back of his head and replied "It was kind of similar to the diary back in second year. A form of Riddle tried to play mind games with us but Ron managed to destroy it before it had gone too far." Graciously, Harry decided to spare Ron the embarrassment of having Hermione hear the details of Ron's worst fear. Ron nodded in silent appreciation for Harry's discretion.

Hermione nodded and in a businesslike tone addressed Ron. "Well, I guess we are fortunate that you finally decided to show some loyalty tonight. But don't you think for _one single second_ that I've forgiven you for how you've acted Weasley. I'm grateful that Harry is alive and if I have you to thank for that then so be it. But as far as I'm concerned I'd rather not be in your presence right now. It's Harry's decision whether or not he'll accept you back. This is his mission and he gets to call the shots.

"Harry," she said softly, but loud enough for Ron to hear, "if my concealment skills are as good as he says then we can relax the night watch shifts a bit. When you're finished with him come to bed with me. I'll be waiting for you." Leaning on her toes, she placed a gentle kiss on his cheek, but in an area close enough to his lips to be somewhat suggestive.

With that she walked back into her bedroom, pulling the heavy curtains over the entrance to block out the view.

Harry had to blink several times to regain his senses. As he did so, he turned once more to face Ron who had a look of mingled fury etched on his face. "So," he said icily, "when did this happen? The two of you?"

Harry looked straight into his eyes with not a trace of detectable remorse. Of course, inside, Harry was highly embarrassed about the not so subtle revelation of their relationship by Hermione. But he decided not to let his uneasiness show.

"About three weeks ago. We both admitted that we had feelings for one another and decided to give it a try. It's been working great so far."

Ron snorted. "Really? What about all that crap from last year then? You trying to tell me that was just for show?"

Harry shook his head. "No. She really did try with you. You were just too stuck on yourself to notice. I'm not going to apologize for being with Hermione. If I were a bit smarter I would have asked her out years ago. Probably fourth year, now that I think of it. You made her feel like rubbish last year and you haven't done much differently since then. I hate to tell you this but that ship has sailed for you and her. It's over."

Ron's ears were growing scarlet, a tell tale sign of danger. "What about Ginny then?" he demanded. "Just going to cast her aside for some easy girl that's convenient?"

Harry's eyes narrowed angrily. "I'd rethink that Ron. You do realize you just called Hermione easy?"

"Don't avoid the question. What about Ginny?"

"What _about_ Ginny? We haven't been together since June. That was seven months ago."

"You didn't have a problem with snogging her at my house before the wedding."

"That was a mistake. And to be clear, _she_ kissed _me_. I never allowed it to happen again after that."

"You're leading her on."

"I made it clear that our relationship was over. Did I think that maybe there was a chance to pick it back up again after this was all over, if I made it out alive? Yeah. But times have changed. My feelings changed. I'm with Hermione now. And I'm a damn sight happier than I have been in a good long time."

"You're stringing my sister along!"

"Says the king of stringing girls along!" Harry said heatedly. "You spent the last three years stringing Hermione along! First it was about Krum. You basically insinuated that she was a troll when she suggested we could ask a friend to the ball, then you got all jealous when she went to the ball with him, _and then_ you criticized her for betraying me. You never could stand to hear about Krum after that. Do you have any idea how confusing that is to a girl?

"First Hermione's a troll, then you're jealous that Krum asked her to be his date before you thought to do it. Then you acted all indignant every time she ever mentioned his name or even when _you _brought him up! Fifth year you hardly showed any interest in her. I mean, for crying out loud, if you really wanted to make a move on her you should have done it when you were making your patrols together. You were _both_ prefects.

"And last year it was obvious she was trying to get together with you. You even agreed to go to that stupid party with her. Then what do you do? You make out with Lavender in full view of the common room, knowing that Hermione would see you. You literally started snogging a second girl before you'd even had your first date with the other. And you have the nerve to say _I'm stringing somebody along?_"

Ron diverted his eyes away from Harry, knowing in his heart that he was right. He had blown it. The once chance he'd actually had with Hermione, without Victor Krum or Lavender Brown hovering between them, he'd blown by walking out on them in the heat of anger in the middle of the night.

Harry sighed tiredly. "Look. I'm not going to stand here and argue over who deserves Hermione more. Truth be told _neither_ of us do. We've both been prats toward her for as long as we've known her. Bottom line is I'm with her now. I'm willing to let bygone's be bygones and welcome you back. You saved my life; I'm in your debt and I'm okay with that. But are we going to be able to move past this? Because I'm not going to want to be looking over my shoulder wondering if I've somehow wounded you when I need to be focused on killing Tom Riddle."

Ron continued looking at the ground for a long while. Finally, his eyes met Harry's and he gave a very small nod. As difficult as it was for him to accept, he could see no flaw in Harry's logic. He had screwed it all up and wouldn't be surprised if he never gained back Hermione's friendship. At the very least, he wanted to salvage what remained of his friendship with Harry.

Moving forward, Harry extended his hand for Ron to shake. There was only a moment's hesitation. The two men clasped hands in a show of reconciliation. But Harry tightened his grip on Ron's hand in a show of dominance and gave the youngest Weasley male a hard glare.

"I'm warning you Ron; hold your tongue about Hermione. Whatever you may feel you're going to have to get it under control and fast. Don't ever call my girlfriend easy again."

Ron's eyes flashed with trepidation at the sheer ruthlessness of Harry's message. The implication was clear: Hold your tongue or else. The one-time best friends released one another's hands and Ron began to wonder just how long it would take to gain the duo's trust again. Harry turned in the direction of Hermione's bedroom.

"Since it's your first night back you can keep the first watch. It runs for three hours." Harry wanted to say something more; to express his appreciation for what Ron had done earlier. But his anger was making it difficult. Finally, he mustered up the resolve.

"I'm still hella pissed at you. But for what it's worth, I'm glad you made it back."

Without another word, Harry turned heel and retreated to the room where Hermione was waiting; leaving Ron all alone and wondering how he could have fallen so far.

xXx

When they returned from the Pensieve Hermione dissolved into anguished sobs. _It can't be true,_ she desperately thought. _It absolutely cannot be true! How could Dumbledore have not told him?_

To know that there was a strong possibility that Harry could die was terrifying. To know for a certainty that he _must_ die to accomplish the impossible, to defeat Tom Riddle, was nothing short of suffocating. Hermione didn't know what to do, having no solutions to pull from her brilliant mind. She had never faced anything like this before. There was nothing left, no other options to pursue. They had heard it straight from the proverbial horse's mouth, or in this case the horse's ass: As long as Harry lived, Tom Riddle could not be killed.

That bastard! How could he have had this knowledge for so long, how could he pretend to care about Harry, only to abandon him to a merciless death? Hermione felt the bile rise in her throat as she recalled Snape's astonished words: _All this time you have been raising him as a pig for slaughter!_ And the old man had not even denied it! That manipulative piece of garbage! After all the years she spent thinking that Albus Dumbledore was the greatest, most noble man in the world. After all the time she'd spent trying to convince Harry that the things Skeeter had written about him weren't true, she had been smacked right in the face with the truth: Albus Dumbledore was as deranged as he'd been when off trysting with Grindelwald. His delusional concept of 'The Greater Good' was ruining her life! Not to mention the life of the boy, no, the man, next to her who had literally been dealt a death blow.

It was evil; there was no other word for it. In her current state of mind Hermione couldn't think of anything Tom Riddle had done that had even come close to it. The level of deception that Dumbledore was playing at was truly wicked; malevolence personified. Even Snape had been horrified at hearing the truth of what would happen to his least favorite student. Even _he_ had objected. The irony was not lost on Hermione that Dumbledore's name had figured prominently on the list that Harry had composed several months ago, the list that ultimately was responsible for bringing the two of them together. Albus Dumbledore had abandoned Harry once again.

What sickened Hermione the worst was that Dumbledore had been subtly maneuvering Harry into this for years. He had played on Harry's passion for his friends and loved ones, his 'saving people thing', in order to set the stage for this moment. He had reminded Harry almost every year of how remarkable he was, and had deliberately kept Harry ignorant of the most important facts until the stage was finally set and the final battle had begun. Only then, when confronted with the imminent demise of all whom he cared for, could Harry be trusted with the most critical piece of information: He had been a tool all along; a tool that had outlived its usefulness and was to be discarded. Dumbledore was playing on Harry's love for his friends even from the grave. That sick son of a bitch!

Tears were freely flowing now as Hermione pulled Harry into a crushing embrace, silently pleading for him not to do what she knew he had already decided must be done. Curse his damn nobility! It wasn't fair! She wouldn't let them take Harry from her! They had been through too much together, shared too much between each other for her to let go of him now.

"Hermione, it's okay."

"N-No it is _not_!"

"If it means the death of Riddle…"

"No! Harry, listen to yourself! Nothing is worth you're death, nothing! I won't let you do it! You can't leave me!"

Harry was struggling now to hold back his own tears. It's not like this was easy for him. He actually had something to live for. To walk headlong into death now, knowing there was no alternative was the hardest blow he had ever been dealt. Nothing came close to this.

"Hermione, if it means stopping him…"

"NO!"

"There's no other choice! There's a piece of him inside me!"

"There has to be another way!"

"There isn't! Otherwise Dumbledore would have said-"

"I don't trust Dumbledore! Dumbledore wasn't omnipotent; he's made plenty of errors of judgment. Who's to say he didn't make one here?"

"We don't have time to try and figure it out. There's only a half hour left before Riddle's ultimatum runs out. He'll kill everyone here if I don't turn myself in! I can't let that happen! Do you have any idea what they would do to you if they win? You think they'll just kill you quick and easy? Remember Malfoy Manor! They like to play with their food before eating it and in more ways than one! I'll be damned if I let that happen to you! If I die Riddle can be defeated and the Death Eaters will scatter. It's the only option."

Harry concluded his speech in a hollow voice, unable to muster up the volume any more. Hermione's eyes were raw form crying and her breath was catching in quick spurts. She was surprised she hadn't yet gone into shock.

"I'm sorry Hermione" Harry said. "I don't want to go. I love you so much. These last six months have been the happiest of my life. You are the most remarkable woman I've ever met. Just promise me you won't let my death go to waste. Kill him. Kill him and find a different life. Leave the country, leave this whole world behind and go live like an ordinary person. Whatever will make you happy, whatever will bring you peace, go do it. Do it for me…please."

Hermione shook her head. "I can't. The only thing that will make me happy is you. If you have to die…then I'll die with you."

"No!"

"Harry I've already made that choice many times over. I knew we could die during first year but I went with you to save the stone anyway. I knew we could potentially lose everything when we went back in time to save Sirius but I did it anyway. I knew what might be waiting for us at the Ministry fifth year _but I went with you anyway_. I've always known that my mortality was at risk whenever I go off on an adventure with you. This is no different. I will go with you anywhere. Even if that means to the grave. I love you."

The two embraced for a long, desperate kiss that was packed with every emotion conceivable. Love, loyalty, despair, fear, courage, bravery, friendship, passion; nothing was left out of that kiss.

Harry buried his face in Hermione's hair, reveling for the last time, in her scent. Suddenly, Hermione gasped "The snitch!"

"What?"

"The snitch that Dumbledore left you! Where is it?"

Harry pulled the golden object out of his pocket. He'd been carrying it around with him all year. "What about it?" he asked.

"I open at the close. This is it! The close! Open it!"

"How?"

"Just do what comes natural."

Harry stared at the snitch for a moment before speaking. "I am about to die." With a small click the tiny ball opened.

Flipping it over, a small, smooth stone fell into his palm. "Oh my…"

"Harry, it's the stone!"

"But...why?"

"Do you think you're supposed to use it?"

"Why would I? The story didn't paint it in a very good light."

"Harry we're running out of time!"

"You're so beautiful."

"I-what?"

Harry smiled at the woman before him despite the grim situation. He wasn't even sure why he'd said it. Sure it was true, but it wasn't entirely appropriate to the situation. Still, Harry continued.

"I remember the first time I ever encountered one of these awful horcruxes. Second year, and I didn't even know what they were. I remember thinking to myself that I had to stop monster of Slytherin because it would save you. I think I loved you even then Hermione. A more innocent kind of love, sure, but love just the same. I've always loved you. I loved you so much I was ready to face a basilisk for you. And it was worth every minute of it to see you healthy again. Well worth taking a bite to the arm…"

Harry's eyes became unfocused. Hermione thought he might faint. "Harry?"

"That's it…That's it!" Harry jumped to his feet picking up Hermione, twirling her around the abandoned headmaster's office.

"Harry, what are you doing?"

"I don't have to die!"

Hermione stared in amazement, hardly daring to believe. "What did you say?"

"I don't have to die! Basilisk venom destroys these awful things. If there ever was a piece of Riddle inside me it's been gone since I was twelve years old, when I was bitten by the basilisk! I don't have to die!"

Hermione let out a soft gasp. "Oh my…are you _sure_?"

"It makes sense. Why would the venom work any different in me than on any other object? Dumbledore was wrong. He overlooked this."

"But how did you figure it out?"

Harry smirked. "The power he knows not."

Hermione gazed at him questioningly. "Love. I was thinking of how much I loved you when I thought of it. It's supposed to be my greatest asset against him. I wonder how Tom's going to feel about being loved to death."

Hermione's eyes never left Harry's as he spoke these words. It sounded almost too good to be true. But it had the ring of truth to it.

"Harry…we could win. We could end this tonight; go anywhere we wanted to go."

"And we will. I promise. I'm going to kick Tom Riddle's ass. Then, I'm going to tell all of Britain to bite me and ride off into the sunrise with you by my side. That is, if you'll come with me?"

Harry looked at her questioningly. Hermione smiled her first real smile in weeks. "Harry Potter. I thought we'd established that I will come with you anywhere. Besides, the sunrise sounds a whole lot more appealing than the grave."

xXx

Ginny Weasley was not naïve. She could tell that something was up the moment Harry and Hermione showed up in the Room of Requirement. Ron had been with them but he was lagging behind like some kind of third wheel. But it was the pair of intertwined hands that had been a dead giveaway.

She had wanted to yell and scream right then and there, that famous Weasley temper having reached dangerous levels. But she kept her cool and waited for Harry to explain himself to her. Only he never did. He had barely acknowledged her the entire time before the battle began.

Now, amidst the tumult that had erupted in the wake of the dark lord's defeat, Ginny watched in horror as Harry immediately turned away from the corpse of his enemy and ran towards the brown haired girl that she had once trusted with her deepest secrets, her most personal desires, her infatuation with the boy who was now sucking her face off.

"WHAT THE HELL?!"

There was too much excitement for all of those assembled to notice Ginny's outburst, but plenty of the people in her immediate vicinity turned their heads to see what had caught the fiery tempered girl's displeasure. There, directly in their line of vision, stood Harry Potter and Hermione Granger holding one another's faces with the most desperate expression of longing and desire.

Hermione steeled herself and turned toward the younger girl wearily. She knew this moment had to come sooner or later. "Hello Ginny" she said.

"Hello? _Hello?_ That's all you have to say to me after you just stood there and made out with _my boyfriend_ right in front of me? Who the hell do you think you are Granger?! And _you!_" she said menacingly to Harry. "What do you think you're doing kissing her? Explain yourself!"

Harry squeezed Hermione's arm and stepped closer to Ginny. And to think the encounter with Ron had been awkward.

"Look Ginny. I'm sorry if this comes as a shock to you but I was pretty clear with you that our relationship had ended. I haven't seen you in almost a whole year. A lot has changed since then. Hermione and I are together now and we have been since last December. That's not going to change anytime soon."

Ginny stared openmouthed at her ex-boyfriend thinking that this somehow had to be some awful nightmare. It absolutely _could not_ be real. There was no way. How could Harry, _her_ Harry, choose a know-it-all bookworm, a veritable nerd, over her?

"You're joking" she said wildly. "Tell me you're joking. There's no way you'd ever choose her over me! She's not even pretty!"

Harry frowned. "Ginny, I'm telling you this for your own sake: Don't embarrass yourself. It's been over between us for a year. I'm in love with Hermione; and I think she's quite beautiful actually. I hope we can move past this and remain friends. I do care about you Ginny; I care about your whole family and I'm so sorry for your loss" he said, referring to Fred. "But my path is chosen. Hermione and I are going away together. Somewhere where we can escape all of this" he said, gesturing around the frenzied mob.

Ginny stood dumbfounded. "How could you leave this?" she asked incredulously. "You're the world's hero!"

"I'm nobody's hero" he said flatly. "I'm just Harry. And I'd like to have my life back now. For once _I'd_ like to call the shots. If you can't see that I need to get away, that I'm sick and tired of all of this…then perhaps you don't know me as well as you think you do. Good-bye Ginny. I'm sorry to have hurt you."

And with that Harry walked back towards Hermione, taking her hand as they went off together. Ginny felt her stomach clench painfully as she watched the love of her life walk away hand in hand with one of her best friends. She felt betrayed. She felt angry. She felt humiliated. But most of all she felt foolish for holding on to some fantastical notion that Harry would return to her.

He had been right, of course. He had broken up with her almost a year ago. That one kiss at the Burrow afterward had been her doing. She had acknowledged at the time that there would be a distinct possibility that he would find someone else while on his journey. But to see the reality of it before her eyes was something she had not prepared herself to handle. Slumping her shoulders, she fell into the understanding embrace of her brother, who knew all too well the pain of losing out where Harry Potter was concerned.


	4. Epilogue

**The Chosen One Disappears**

"In a shocking turn of events Harry Potter, the Chosen One, the Boy Who Lived, etc. etc., disappeared from Britain on Tuesday May 5, 1998. Three days after Mr. Potter's defeat of the most terrible dark lord of all time, the factually named Tom Marvolo Riddle, Mr. Potter disappeared along with his long-time companion and rumored love interest, Hermione Granger. Mr. Potter's Gringotts vaults were emptied of its contents on Monday May 4th and none of those closest to Potter or Granger have been told anything of their whereabouts…."

xXx

Far away from the uproar in Britain, Harry and Hermione were settling into a nice, long day spent on the beach of Queensland, Australia. They had decided together that they had had it with the hypocrisy in Britain and absconded to the island continent to search for Hermione's parents. Upon arrival, however, they decided to hold off the search for another week as they enjoyed a much needed, and even more deserved, vacation.

Using the funds Harry had withdrawn from his trust account, as well as half the fortunes from both the Black account and the main Potter account (different from Harry's trust fund), the latter two of which had been cut in half as a concession to the Goblins for their ransack of Gringotts, Harry and Hermione converted most of their gold, silver, and bronze coins into paper tender. They had no clue if they would ever go back. They decided that, for now, they didn't care.

Tom Riddle was dead, the Ministry had actually chosen a competent leader (they really needed to congratulate Kingsley somehow), and the remaining Death Eaters were being arrested every day. For now, the young couple was content to lie together on the warm sand and talk about their lives. There were many decisions that needed to be made after all.

There was the issue of how they would explain the missing year to Hermione's parents. Hermione was deeply fearful that her parents would not accept her explanation and apology and would cast her out of their lives. Harry knew better than to discount Hermione's fears but tried his best to be supportive and offer whatever assistance she required.

Also up for discussion was the question of their living arrangements. After living in the same quarters for the last year Hermione was not keen on separating from Harry. Neither of them had broached the topic of their futures very much while Riddle had been alive. The future was always too uncertain. Now, though, Hermione was ready to take the next step in their relationship and Harry was more than happy to oblige. The problem was, finding out what the next step was, was difficult.

"I…well… I don't think I'm ready for sex. Not yet. I'm sorry." Hermione looked anxiously at Harry, hoping that he wouldn't be too disappointed.

"Hermione, I'm fine with things just as they are. I don't think anything less of you because you want to wait. In fact, I've always thought that sort of thing should wait until marriage anyway." Hermione's eyes grew wide. Harry smiled. "It just seems to cheapen the effect if you were to just sleep with every person you dated. What's the point of marriage if you're going to do everything involved with marriage before you're married? And honestly? If you ever grace me by allowing me to share something that special with you, I'd be willing to wait for as long as you wanted. You're the only person for me Hermione. I hope you feel the same way."

Hermione answered him by pulling him in for a long, sensuous kiss that held a guarantee of better things to come. After breaking apart she smiled coyly at him. "You know, if you'd told me a year ago that you and I would be kissing each other on a beach in Australia less than a week after defeating Riddle and trying to work out when we should have sex I would have thought you were mad. Of course, it's long been a fantasy of mine, but a year ago I had put that fantasy aside. Amazing how things work out, isn't it?"

Harry smirked. "I'm not even going to tell you the thoughts I had after I saw you in those robes at the Ball in fourth year. It was quite an eye opening experience."

Hermione smacked his arm playfully. "Harry Potter, what kind of thoughts about me did you have?"

"Good thoughts Hermione. Really good thoughts."

Hermione huffed but inside she was pleased. If only she'd known then where Harry's thoughts were going she might have saved herself the embarrassment and heartache of sixth year. But as she thought about it she realized that if they'd acted on their attraction to one another when both so young things might not have ended as well. What if they'd broken up because they had been so immature? Would they still be friends? Would they be together now?

Hermione didn't like to think that she would have ended up with any man besides the one next to her but those thoughts were really irrelevant. They were together now. And although they were not addressing it at the moment, there would be many long discussions in the future about the deaths of their friends and other loved ones that did not survive the war.

Hermione hoped that one day, they would be at peace with their pasts and that she and Harry could live quietly with the soft pitter-patter of tiny feet running throughout their house as their children laughed and played without the constant threat of death hanging over them. She hoped that their children would have their grandparents in their lives as well.

The two remained in comfortable silence for several moments. Finally, Harry said "You know Hermione, I don't want to rush into anything. Actually, I'd like to take things really slow with us. Our first six months together have been way too chaotic. Having to constantly save each other from certain death isn't exactly my idea of romance. I'd like the opportunity to just have some innocent dates without any pressure. Of course, our relationship runs deeper than any first time boyfriend/girlfriend; but just to take you out to lunch or dinner would be wonderful. I'm so sick of having to rush into everything because I'm afraid my life will be over before I get to it. Let's just have fun together."

Hermione felt her chest flutter at Harry's words and resolved right then and there that she would do everything in her power to make this man the happiest in the world. "I'd love to have fun with you Mr. Potter" she breathed. "But there really is so much we need to do first. After we find my parents we need to decide where we'll go from there. Do we stay in Australia? Do we travel farther abroad? We've agreed not to go back to Britain but we have to live _somewhere_. What kind of house do we choose? Or maybe an apartment? You own all of this property from your inheritance, we could see if any houses are located outside of Britain. Oh, and we'll have to get jobs. I'm interested in traveling. Do you think you'd want to see the world with me?"

Harry smiled as Hermione rambled on, her endless questions and ideas reminding him of why he fell in love with her in the first place. Her inquisitive nature was naturally stimulating and it made her the cleverest woman in the world. The fact that she would always be able to outsmart him one way or another actually was kind of hot.

"That's an awful lot of stuff to do" Harry said teasingly. "You think you might want to make a list?"

Their eyes met as they recalled that night so many months ago, when a list set them on an entirely new course.

"You know Harry, I think you're right. A list would be an excellent place to start. But we have nothing to write with on the beach."

Harry smirked. "That's okay. We can make the list later. I've got something much better in mind that we can do for now."

"And what's that?"

"I never did ever formally ask you to go on a date with me."

Hermione blushed. "Oh really? Well what are you planning to do about that?"

Harry flashed his trademark grin at her; the grin that would always make Hermione's knees go weak. "Hermione Granger, would you like to go on a date with me?"

"Wherever to?"

"How about the beach?"

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Smooth Potter. Real smooth."

"Is that a yes?"

Hermione grinned saucily. "On one condition."

"Oh? There are conditions now?"

"Tell me when you first realized that you loved me. Not romantically, but as a friend. We loved each other as friends before we became a couple."

Harry closed his eyes thoughtfully. After a moment's deliberation, he said "Second year. After you were petrified. I realized that I felt more strongly about you than anyone else. Didn't we already cover that a few days ago?"

Hermione grinned wider. "Maybe. I just wanted to hear it again. I can't help it Harry. I'm smitten."

"And I'm the luckiest guy in the world. Here's to our new life together."

"To us. Perfect Harmony."

* * *

**Author's Note:** And this is the definitely cheesy end to 'The List.' It's quite a short epilogue but, unfortunately, I just couldn't get anymore out of this story. Thank you very much to all who have read/reviewed/followed, etc. It means a lot. Take care all.


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